Ramblings for the Evening (6/05/06)

Can I just tell you that I find it deliciously ironic that on the eve of the supposed "Day of the Demon" I have officially received my sixth email from an angry reader? Yes, apparently my comments on Pat Robertson, as well as the Pope, were not liked by a few readers. I have to say: I love hatemail. It usually is just a rambling mess with only one through line: "Here's why you're stupid, and I'm right."
Good stuff.
What's funnier than that? I've gotten more mail...about Anderson Cooper. The Coop's got a lot of friends out there. I'd write about him, but I don't want another...well...you all remember the last time I wrote about a reporter....Sigh.
Do you think I could piss off more people if I talk about the fact that New York should get that money back? I mean if you were a terrorist, would you attack New York or Wyoming? If you said Wyoming, you're a liar. You don't deserve your 72 virgins.
Ok, let's do this.
So, without further ado: SWEET CAROLINE....BOP, BOP, BOP!
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David Hasselhoff is Omnipresent:
Seriously, this guy is EVERYWHERE. In the last few weeks, here's where he's been (in no particular order):
American Idol Finale (where he cried. Sorry, HE CRIED when the dude won).
Courtside at a Dallas Mavericks/ Phoenix Suns game.
Sportscenter.
Various talk show programs (he's pimping a new CD apparently).
In Germany promoting the World Cup (it's only a few days away now).
He's also a judge on America's Got Talent (That one is too easy to make fun of, so moving on).
Oh, did I mention that Steven Spielberg wants him in the Baywatch movie, and he may be a part of the Knight Rider movie?
This just goes to show you: if you go through an incredibly tough divorce and 'roid up (and I think he may be 'roiding, but that's just my opinion, folks), you too can have a great career.
Look, I'm not going to Hassel the Hoff", but I am going to ask: Why is he the only 80's star that we are resurrecting? Where's Tuti? What about Rick (Don't Call Me Ricky, Bitch) Schroeder? Where's Yahoo Serious?
I'm just saying...I'm slightly worried that I might walk into my school tomorrow and see him there. Then, when I stop to get gas for my car...he'll be there. Then, when I head out to buy groceries, he'll be there.
It's a little creepy.
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An Open Call to the Theatre Class of 2006:
Ok theatre grads, this is an invite.
If you wish, I am opening up the booth to allow any of the graduating theatre kids the ability to paint one brick as their own. This will become a new annual event for the theatre people. You want to bring your own paint? (which I recommend.) Do it. You want to decorate your square with pictures? Do it. It's your call.
My plan is to do this on Thursday. You want to do it earlier, let me know. You're the first class, so the placement is up to you.
and finally:
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Hey, Minnesota Wild!:
To the local team,
I really hope you're paying attention.
Look at the Edmonton Oilers. This is a team that spent most of the last 15 years (since they won their last championship) as a joke. However, in the new NHL, this team is now thriving. They're spending money (did you see the Pronger trade and multiple signings), and they take chances (they traded for Roloson).
Look at the Carolina Hurricanes. They, too, have spent money and made trades.
Both teams had attendance issues, but guess what? They STILL spent the money to make the team better.
Now, I am a loyal season ticket holder. I have been for a while now. I have also attended many games since I first moved up here which also happened to be the team's first season. When team kind of screwed people during the lockout season, I did not complain. Nope, I paid my money.
This past season, however, you did NOT play into the new NHL. Your team reamained like the old guard. In fact, the Wild only spent barely over the minimum salary cap.
So, I want you as a business to look at the Edmonton Oilers and the Carolina Hurricanes. Two teams that did NOT spend the least amount of money and look what happened to them. The Oilers are the first number eight seed to make the finals (and they will probably win it in six). They traded for Roloson (who most fans AND management said was, "done."), and they made it MORE affordable for the fans instead of raising prices on a mediocre team.
I, as a loyal season ticket holder, declare the following:
1. If the team trades away the veterans and then rarely plays the superstar kids, I will no longer be a ticket holder.
2. If you have a subpar season (not making the playoffs, or, worse yet, being under .500), and you still raise ticket prices, I will no longer be a ticket holder.
3. If you do absolutely nothing in the offseason to try and get a big ticket name (hi, Zdeno Chara, did we mention that Minnesota is a great deal like the Czech Republic?), or to improve the team (DEEEEFEEEENNNNNSSSSSEEEEE), then I will no longer be a ticket holder.
Use the Oilers' model, folks.
They made the finals...we're playing golf.
Just a thought.
Namaste.