Saturday, October 01, 2005

To Sleep, Dream

My insomnia has come back with a vengance. Beyond the fact that I was incredibly sore last night (more on that later), the wheels in my head were spinning very fast and were quite loud.
There's something absolutely terrible about being awake in the dark. Now, I love that stretch from two to six where the world is dead, but only when I want to be out in it. When I want to sleep, and I can't, that's a whole different ballgame.
So as I lay there last night, I couldn't stop thinking about the most random things. First, however, you may want to know why I was sore (or maybe you don't care). Yesterday, I played tennis with a guy who is a lobbyist. It was very interesting talking to him about his work. It was also embarrassing because the guy beat up on me. I had no footing and no feel for my shots. At one point, I slipped and my ankle was not pleased. Anyway, it reminded me of the lawyers I used to work with on the Tobacco trials. That was one aspect that kept me up last night. I thought alot about the fact that it had been some time since I left that job...and I didn't miss it. At the same time, I didn't really miss the people I worked with either. Yet, I wondered why that wasn't a bad thing.
Now, the other thing that kept me up was getting hit by a car. That's right, I got hit. It wasn't super serious, but my right leg, especially my hip, is really sore. As I strolled (ok hobbled) across the Hwy. 100 Northwest Athletic Club parking lot, I noticed a guy on his cell phone getting in his car. I should have thought about that, but I didn't. I was thinking about my ankle, and my game, and the world. My car was two down from Senor Cellphone, so I walked on the same side. Still on his phone, not paying attention, and starting to back up, Cellphone dude hit his gas to accelerate back and hit me with the corner of his car. This is essentially what went through my brain in the seconds it took for him to hit me and me to go down.

Wow, that was bad. You suck. Work on the backhand. It's amazing what people will hire lobbyists for. What the hell is that? (At this point, the left side of a Audi Quattro hits my right side.) Ah jiminy! Don't fall into the other car. Crap, here comes the ground.
What really angered me, was the response I got from Cellphone guy. He stops, open the door, goes to the back of the car, looks at the corner, then at me, and says, "Are you ok? (I nod yes, tough my hip hurts) Did you damage the paint?"
Ok. not, "Can I help you up? Can I do anything?" Nope. Did I damage the paint. My first thought was, "Get out the tennis racket and hit the car HARD!" I didn't do it. I should have, but I was kinda shocked on two levels: This guy's idiocy and this guy HITTING ME WITH HIS CAR!

The other thing that was utterly fascinating (considering I couldn't sleep) was seeing Jesse Ventura on The Big Idea With Donny Deutsch. This was a repeat as he had been on Thursday night, but a few things struck me about the former governor of this state:
1. He is looking more and more like a retired pirate. All he needs now is an eyepatch, a peg leg, and to talk with "Arghs," and "Ayes". Seriously. He didn't have the hat on, so his totally bald top was shining in the light.
2. He shakes ALOT. I don't know if he's sick, but man, his head was almost like a bobble-head. He would shake like a snake preparing to strike. It was very strange.
(Side note: I think Tom Arnold is on drugs. He exhibits all the signs, and he CANNOT sit still for a second on that Damn Sports show).
3. (And most odd) A great deal of what Ventura had to say made sense. That's right. You heard me. He made sense. He talked about the failure of governments, people, the left and the right, etc. He talked about how people use God as a shield instead of answering the tough questions. He talked about how several members of the government support the War in Iraq "for freedom," but then limit those same freedoms in this country. It was kinda cool. Sure, part of it was that I was (and am) tired, but it showed that he at least understands politics better than alot of people.
When you can't sleep, you look to make yourself busy. You try to tire yourself out. Maybe it's by reading (which usually works for my wife). Maybe it's writing or correcting papers (which I don't recommend doing when tired. You miss MANY things). For me, it's different things. It's watching old movies to feel comfortable. It's reading Shakespeare to rememorize the sillioquies. Most importantly, however, when I can't sleep, I think about what's come before me. I think about students I've worked with and wonder if they are ok. I think about what I've been through, where I've come from, and where I hope go. I think about the next generation after me and whether or not they'll have a world to enjoy.
Then again, what do I know? I'm the guy quoting Hamlet to his cats at 3 in the morning. I could be wrong.


Meridita said...

You got hit by a car! Damn, that sucks! Poor Leab... *sad puppy dog face*

I was with the awake for much of last night too. Warm orange juice... weird, it's good when you have a sore throat, but it made me sleepy at about 4 am, after watching too many infomercials and reading too many back copies of National Geographic. (I am aware of the Dork-y-ness, OKAY!) You know, maybe the orange juice just came at the same time as the Tired... either way, twas yummy!

Anonymous said...

listening to people talk on the radio works well for me. just random boring talk shows that are only on at 3:00 a.m. b/c they're just that bad.


click said...

Poor Leab, sorry about the delay in responding, I have been out of commission for the past few days. Hit by a car, and then the guy was an ass about it. MAN, that just gets me all in a tissy.

As far as insomnia goes, I find milk calms you down, cold or warm, (I have read that it is because it is what we eat when we are newborns, do not know if that is true, but it would make sense to me.) and I have my mind like a big blackboard, and keep sweeping back and forth with an eraser over my mind and every time a thought starts to come in I quick go over and erase it. It usually works for me. But sometimes, there ain't a damn thing we can do about it!