It's very strange when people actually listen to you. More often than not, we glumly look at another person, shaking our head as if to say we're listening, but really we are somewhere else. As a teacher, I'm used to a room full of these people. They stare at you with eyes of glass and nod only when you look at them. Perhaps one or two students are listening, but most of the time they are thinking about that afternoon, or a video game they were playing, or whatever runs through the mind of a 9th-12th grade student. This is not limited to the classroom either. No one can claim to have never performed the "Fake Listening Trick." We've all done it. There's even a skill to it.
You get a phone call from someone you know, but it's an inopportune time. They begin their story while you are doing whatever it is you need to finish or just want to do. At random intervals when the voice stops, you interject a "uh-huh," or a "I understand." So that's why it's so strange when people actually listen to you. Then whatever you told them is there for until they forget. In this digital age, if a person posts (like in a blog or live journal) what you told them, then it is there for all to see.
I bring this up, because there is one student who I am convinced does not really listen to me, but likes to play games with me. We will discuss her in her own blog another time. Anyway, this student has a blog of her own. Recently, she has been unhappy about a few things, and she has, in my opinion, a very skewed view of the world. She is also young. Somewhere in the sixteen to eighteen range (and before you get that thought in your mind, dear reader, no. I never would. Get over it). I decided to give her some advice. Basically, I gave her the rules by which I live my life. I won't share those with you now, but suffice to say, I was shocked when I saw the she had put them on her blog. I meant to help her with her issues, but I really didn't think that she would actually listen to me (she is a master of the Fake Listening Technique).
This goes to show you that sometimes people can surprise you and actually listen. Beyond that, it shows the power that words have. You've all heard, "Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me." If that were true, however, then words would not have the power to draw out emotions.
So be careful, you never know when someone may actually be listening to you.
2 comments:
so then do you automatically assume that people don't listen to the advice that you give them? b/c that isn't true, even if it seems as though some people ignore it, they usually listen to it.
It's not an assumption, and it's not about me. People, in general (yes, a generalization), choose not to listen. Overall, we're sure we know the answer, we just want confirmation that our choices are correct.
Post a Comment