Ramblings for the Morning (6/17/05)

Ok, one more post before heading for the bus of the sky (or my Northwest flight).
Tom Cruise proposes to Katie Holmes on top of the Eiffel Tower.
In Paris? That's so cliche. Seriously though, I hope they're happy. The whole thing really does feel like a publicity stunt, but who cares? It's their lives to do with what they want, and we should just respect that. My question is will sections of Dianetics by L. Ron Hubbard be read at the wedding? Now, media hounds, go find some real news.
Minnesota now is now "7th" among states with lakes.
Apparently a new study was done where if a body of water could be seen with a sattelite, it was counted in this study. So, which state is now numero uno when it comes to bodies of water? It's Texas! That's right, the Lone Star State has the most amount of bodies of water (man-made or otherwise) that can be seen from a sattelite, thus it has around 370,000. My question is this: Did they count every pool that was shaped like a boot if it was big enough? Honestly, without the lakes, what does Minnesota have that it can pride itself on? "Come to Minnesota, land of passive-agressive tendencies." No, that doesn't work. How about, "Minnesota, we're right by Canada!" We'll let's just wait and see how this plays out.
The incredibly violent and cute cartoon.
Holy cow. The cartoon Happy Tree Friends is incredibly violent with cutesy characters. You see these little squirrels or Lumpy the Moose, and your first thought is, "Awww. Cuuuuttte." Then someone's face is crushed by a sign, or an eyeball is cut in place of a lemon, and that feeling turns to utter dread. In that way, it's the perfect allegory for someone learning the truth about modern American society. On the outside, it appears to be a wonderous place, but once immersed in it, society begins to eat away at your rose-colored glasses....Sorry, went off on a tangent. Check out the cartoon, but make sure you have a strong stomach.
It must be a slow news day in New York.
The cover story of the New York Post is about a girl whose yearbook picture is bad. That's not really worthy of the cover story. There's war, death, and other unhappy and major events going on, and the Post is worried about one bad photo? Hey, where the heck were you when I got my first license picture? Where were you when most of America was getting its yearbook photos taken? This is not cover story material. What about the former Klansman who fell ill during his trial? How about the fact that U.S. launched another big operation in West Iraq? No, that's just not as important as an 11 year old girl with a bad yearbook photo. Sorry doctors who cured cancer. You're relegated to page 15, because the Post has a picture of two dancing seals. Top story tonight: Seals dance in circles! see pages 1,3, & 4!
I got (more) hatemail.
It's true, it's true. A person known as "Super Republican" (with the power of PORK SPENDING!) sent me an email about how people like me are the reason this country is falling apart. Why? Because I made fun of the fact that I was invited to this town hall meeting. I'm sorry, I didn't realize the humor makes me unAmerican. Hey, do we still have those camps in California? We could round up every single comedian in the world and put them in those camps. But wait, it would have to be anyone who makes a joke, so that means Republican and Democratic pundits are going too. Wow, this could rival the Holocaust. Look, I'm just a guy putting his opinion out there. You don't have to like it, and you don't have to read it, but why take the time (at 1 in the morning no less) to write an angry email about how I am going to, "burn in Hell," and how my making fun of the fact that the current government thinks that I am a senior citizen (which is a problem in my honest opinion) means that I am, "unpatriotic." And why does every person who argues for this administration use, "If you don't love it, then leave it"? Look, I like this country. I just dislike the people in it. I like the amber waves of grain. I dislike the greedy corporations that rape those waves. Our government is supposed to be the greatest in the world, but then how is it that they think I'm 65? How is it that they treat their voters like second class citizens? I'm just making observations here. That shouldn't mean that I "hate America," Super Republican.
A new survey shows that people don't want to go out to the movies anymore.
Many of them said that it is "too far to go." That's a commentary on the state of the U.S, folks. The movie theater is too far to go? This survey was done in major cities. They cited New York, Los Angeles, Dallas, Chicago, Miami, and Seattle. How can the movie theatre be too far away, when there's one every few blocks. A majority of those asked also said it would just be easier to wait until the film is on television. I don't know about the rest of you, but I really do love (and I'm using "love" here) going to the movies. There's something about it. It's why I get so mad when people treat it like they're watching television. There's a magic that happens in the movie theater that doesn't happen on a television screen. It's like being locked away from the world. So it saddens me that people feel that the movie theater is just too far for them.
And finally: School's officially out.
Yep, the students are all on summer break. I already don't hear from them anymore. The jury's out on if that's a good thing or a bad thing. Many of them have taken off on adventures out of this country. Good for them. Have fun while you're young, because when you enter the working world, life starts to move faster.
Ok, off to the airport.